Oh! Doctor
By Rubey Cowan and Billy Joyce
Published 1920

[verse 1]
Most ev'rybody you meet now a days
Seems to be feeling so blue
They say it is an imposition
To enforce this prohibition
And I think so too
But Congress has given Doctors the power
To hand out the Brandy and Rye
And now in their office at most any hour
You're bound to hear somebody cry.

[chorus]
Oh! Doctor, Oh! Doctor, I'm feeling blue
Oh! Doctor, Oh! Doctor, it's up to you
The drug stores on the corners are filled with liquor mourners
I told a drug clerk my condition,
He said, "Go see your physician!"
Oh! Doctor, Oh! Doctor, don't feel my pulse
That's not what I need for results
Write the prescription and please make it say
"Take with your meals," I eat ten times a day
Oh! Doctor, Oh! Doctor, help me pull thro'
For I'll never get well 'till you do.

[verse 2]
When Congress told us that liquor must go
Things looked quite bad for a while
We never thought they'd pass new by laws
That would force on us these dry laws
But now we can smile
For I have a way to fool each politician
Who said ev'ry state must go dry
And now when I'm sad and I'm lacking ambition
I go to my doctor and cry

[repeat chorus]