Taxes and Communism

Performed by Will Rogers
c. 1935
[rebroadcast October 30, 1951]

"Well, all I know is what I read in the paper."

"You have just heard the most familiar line spoken by America's most beloved cowboy humorist Will Rogers, whose own voice is now brought to you transcribed Dentine, the gum with breathtaking flavor, and, Chiclets, the candy-coated gum with a flavor that won't chew out. The record you are about to hear is a a collector's item, taken from recordings made more than fifteen years ago by Will Rogers. His now-immortal voice comes to you once again through the curtain of the years. Here is America's lariat-spinning, gum-chewing cowboy philosopher, Will Rogers."

"Now that brings us down to taxes. Boy when you bring us down to taxes you gonna hear a howl like a pet coon. You don't bring us down there. This money comin' from all the government, uh, is throwin' away, well it just sorta looks like it might come--where's it comin' from? Everybody says, Where's the money comin' from we're spendin'? Well, I don't know, but just offhand I'd say it's comin' from those that got it, you know? Now I don't know, that may be just a rough idea of mine, I don't know, but I kinda believe that's where it's comin' from. But the big yield comes now-a-days from the taxpayers. I'll bet you when the pilgrims landed at Plymouth Rock and they had the whole of the American continent, you know, to themselves, you know, just them and them pilgrims there, landed up there; and all they had to do to get an extra 160 acres was shoot another Indian, you know? Well, I'll betcha anything they kicked on the price of ammunition, you know. I'll bet they said, 'what's this country comin' to?'--you know what I mean? Like we're doing now, you know--what's this country comin' to? You know. This country's comin' to that we have to spend a nickle for powder, 'course they got the lead back after they dissected the Indian. I don't know, ain't it funny? No matter what we pay, I don't care whether we pay high taxes, low taxes, medium taxes or no taxes--anything, the yield is always the same. 'Course we know that our government is costing us more than its worth, but do you know of any other cheaper government that's runnin' around, I mean, do you? I mean if you do they'll sell you a ticket there any time. Now you can try Russia, I was over there. Yeah. You can try Russia, there's no income tax in Russia, but there's no income. Now the whole question is, how can we make such a holler on what the government wants to collect back from us, you know? I don't know what it's all about, this is just to kill time up here 'till somethin' else comes along. "

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