Special Investigation

Performed by the Watergate Seven
Recorded 1973

NIXON: Good evening,

My fellow Americans, I have elected to go on television this evening for a very special announcement. Now you should know that it is very special, because to my left on the table behind me is a picture of my royal family. Uh, LOYAL family. And to my right is the bust of my favorite president, Warren G. Harding. I'm here to announce the name of the man I have chosen to be the Special Investigator in the Watergate Affair. And because I want to get to the truth of this matter, I have found just the man to head up this investigation.

SPECIAL PROSECUTOR: 'Scuse me. Wait a minute, wait a minute. Am I bothering you? Say, would you do me, would you mind if I take your picture? My wife would get a big kick out of it. Say, that's a terrific suit you're wearing. Suit like that must cost, what, two, three hundred dollars? You mind if I ask you a question? How many pairs of pants you get with an outfit like that?

NIXON: Well that's all very well and good, but the American people want to know how you're going to begin this investigation.

SPECIAL PROSECUTOR: Oh, I'm sorry. You know sometimes I just start talking and, I don't know. But I'll tell ya what, why don't I start with you. What do you do around here?

[lyrics transcribed by listening. Send corrections via the contact link on the main page]